The Free State
"Man, in a word, has no nature. What he has is - history."

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Oops... more collateral damage

I urge you to donate contact lenses to our glorious crusaders in Iraq. I mean, how many people know the difference between Arabs and those crazy yurpeans.

An Italian reporter had just been saved by Italian forces (no really!). Luckily, our armed forces quickly put an end to this Italian bravado by shooting dead the officer in charge.

This Bulgarian, usually referred to as "one of those damn commies", was also shot, on account that you can't tell the difference between their flag and the Italians'.

Despite the injury and loss of life, collateral damage is a great way of meeting people.

The quest for finding American replacement bodies to fill in the gaps is not going well. More and more Americans are unable to distinguish a plank from their face.

A skilled potential recruit, this little fat kid, gave recruiters false hope. He blew his brains out shortly after proving his skill in the Red Lake High School Massacre. His worth was disputed as he was unable to distinguish the difference between an Indian Nationalist and a crazed anti-anything-that-isn't-white genocidal mass murderer.

Michael Moore has already announced his intention to commerically exploit the killing while claiming the moral high ground with the newly titled "Waterskiing for Red Lake". Coming this Fall!

The quest for finding American bodies to fill in the gaps in Iraq is thus not being very fruitful. But lets not forget we're training the Iraqis for that. By not equipping them with goggles, helmets, kevlar or decent guns, the brass is making sure the Iraqi recruits die for their country in sufficient numbers, so we don't have to.


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